Hair Fairy Blues

Homework? Blog? Homework? Blog? Sleep? Blog?

Ah-hem.

So I keep promising to get things ro-ro-rollin', but I'm really not that cool--or am I? *wink

I feel like my blog is a little random, maybe not so random, but it is definitely fly-by-night because I'm always talking about dieting, the gym, fashion, shopping, and cleaning. It is so....like basically what I'm always doing, hahah, so yeah--HATERS! Paragraph Coolness Rating: 0 out of 10.

Anyways, in an attempt to become much cooler, I think it's time for me to start kicking these blogs up a notch and getting focused on things other than the aforementioned loves of my life. Now don't roll your eyes and immediately think I'm going to be "that" blogger; Come, let me whisk you away to a much cooler, more mature blogspot, with all things beautiful and enchanted.

I promise I haven't been drinking. I was actually just trying to make a joke, but again, for some reason I'm just not. that. freakin. funny. tonight.

Moving on.

After Zumba and Abs class this evening, I hit the grocery for some much needed supplies: formula (check), chocolate milk (check), wipes (check). Oh, and did I mention the three boxes of dark brown hair dye I got on impulse...(um.....check, check, check.)

Darn me, I always get a wild hair when it comes to my hair. The hair fairy is apparently much too close to my ear, because lately that hussy has been screaming for me to do all kinds of things to my long, curly blonde locks. Last week she wanted me to go red, tonight brown, everyday shorter, straighter, bangs, AHHHHH...It's madness and total hair treachery. I need to leave it alone because for SO long I have wanted to grow that sucker out.

Anyway, I have a feeling tomorrow the three $9.99 boxes are going back to their home on the Weis Market shelf, that's if I can resist the temptation to undergo a project of mass destruction, and literally annihilate my hair. 

(Rebuttle, enter Fairy: It is the Fall though guys!!! Brown hair is hot in the fall and winter months. The celebrities are all over it, just crack this month's Vogue--Sarah Jessica is killing me with her flowy, curly, shiny brown hair!!

 No, quietly asks the poor little sad-faced girl with the deranged hair fairy?

:(

Good night.

Blogs, diet, late night TV, Noah's arc, Gaga...wait, huh?

Sooo....three weeks?!?! I know, I know. Uh, I KNOW!

So, what's happened you ask? Well, besides picking up a couple very exciting things: the Lauren Conrad Style book, a new dark grey pair of Nike's with neon pink laces,  two $5 earring sets from Wallys (one set had 8 gold hoops in different sizes, SCORE. I wear hoops like every-freakin-day), and the new Taylor Swift CD (AWESOME!!!); I have been, well, just kind of blah.

{Enter Storm Cloud}

In all honesty, I've kind of jumped off the dieting cliff and gone into super fat mode again, eating forbidden items, and put rather simply, rebelling just for the mere satisfaction of breaking a few rules. Problem is [curse], I'm breaking my own rules and then feeling horrible about it later--I mean like saw-at-my-wrist-with-a-dull-butter-knife--bad, jump-off-a-cliff--bad, bad, bad, bad--bad. (Disclaimer, because I know some of you very logical people need to hear it: Sometimes I use dark humor to describe situations of my own pathetic lowliness. I do not cut myself. Nor do I condone such a thing; And for that matter, I would not jump off a cliff either. ) 

Food is the devil. Forreal people! Food is the devil. Yes, the devil. The devil. Yes. (Are you scared? lol. You should be. Very. Mwhahahaha!)

While my sanity is still very much in tact, I think the past few weeks have stirred me up. There is a saying that "when it rains, it pours", and ain' it the truth sister?!?

The other night, I was up at a strange hour when TV shows turn into full-hour-advertisements.  I was watching this random channel when some unknown author came on to present archeological and historical evidence to support various Biblical references.

As I worked on one of my papers, I caught bits and pieces of the segment. At one point the man talked about the great flood and the archeological findings to support the fact that there was such an event. (I swear there's a point to this stream of thought.)

"Just stay a little longuh."
"Okay Jenny, I'll stay."

Yes, so where was I....last blog, diet, late night TV, Noah's arc.....Yes! Okay, so the man went on to explain that Noah was prepared by the Lord for a flood, and although Noah had never seen such an event, he did not question the Lord. Instead he prepared. He built an arc. He gathered two of every animal on Earth. He obeyed! (*Good boy. Love a man who can follow directions. *jab)

Well, in short (I realize my blog isn't really that short, but...), like Noah did, we all need to prepare for, metaphorically speaking, a flood.

This man, wise author that he was, suggested we all get our lives in order. Yes, organization. Since there are times that sneak up on us and cause mass chaos, we need to get things in order. I am a total D-BAG when it comes to organization. I want to be super organized; desperately, I want to be an organized gal, but I SUCK (for lack of a better word) at keeping things from becoming chaotic.

And, going back to the annoying struggles of my stupid diet (or let's face it, "lack of"), I think I need to get myself back on track by getting organized--hands totally dirty (Uh-gin!) Hate cleaning though. Seriously. Ugggg. **Is it deja vu or um, have I already blogged about organization and cleaning? See, I'm frickin' un-frickin-organized. Man-oh-man-oh-man.

So, Sunday, Funday? Nope, not tomorrow. Tomorrow, the house is undergoing a make-over. The bills are getting filed and/or put on the calendar. The kids summer clothes are getting put in the basement in bins. And, I am going to plan out my meals for the week; all this in an attempt to prepare for a terrential down pour. I'm also going to get out my course syllabi out and get my assignment calendar up--this way I won't have to spend a zillion hours Sunday night doing homework. (Yep, I'm 'that' person. Judge away.)

Once that is finished, I can start to focus again.

I read in Rolling Stone that every morning when Lady Gaga wakes up, she looks in the mirror and says to herself, "B****, you're Lady Gaga, you get up and walk the walk today!" I love the fact that she is starting her day reiterating that she is in control of herself, and she will do what it takes to 'walk the walk'. (Love Gaga.)It's powerful to have that inner strength and control. I am addicted to the feeling of accomplishment that is a result of that inner strength.

So, tomorrow, well...shoot, it is tomorrow...so today...

Today is a brand new day, I'm going to get it back together today because you never know what tomorrow brings.

"B****, I'm Amanda Wilson, and I'm going to walk the walk today."











"As a culture, we tend to kill things we don't understand."

I won't be defeated by you, gas pump!

True Story.

A few days ago I was minding my business, cursing under my breath (as usual) at the gas pump when a man walked up and asked if I had a good sense of humor. Well, duh...so then he asks if he can "pump me!" Absurd? Yes. Completely.

"A good sense of humor?" Riiiight. Is that what I needed? I was thinking the right question for him might have been, "Are you carrying a loaded weapon" or "Do you possess any homicidal tendencies?"

Well, I laugh that OMG-who-are-you laugh and he proceeds to pump my gas while telling me how "beautiful" I am, and what "phenomenal legs" I have, and how great my high heels are.

Thank the Lord, and I mean that in a very sincere way, my dad called when he did because the compliments, while nice, were starting to get really kind of inappropriate--at least for the Sheetz parking lot! Anyway, I pounced on the phone, did a little thanks-for-pumping-me wave and jumped back into the SUV--with my phenomenal legs =)

On the way home, I couldn't wait to tell Jay about it. I knew he would be panting like a dog to hear that his wifey was getting picked at the gas pump. Uh...not so much.

I got home. Told the story. Retold the story in ESPN highlight fashion and quoted the man for the rest of the night. Jay was less than thrilled, but me and my phenomenal legs were amused all the same.

I've been thinking about boycotting gas stations lately and really taking a stand against the borderline inappropriate pick-up lines that men pumping gas construct. Who needs gasoline anyway. *Spit

With that said, I need to get off this computer in time to see the finale of Teen Mom.

<3 Amanda "the beautiful"

Getting back to business.

Hello. Hello. Hello.

What a week this has been--I know, I know, it's Monday and no one wants to hear crap on a Monday; but OMG!

I need fire. I need lights. Smoke. Fireworks. Thunder. Lighting. Divine intervention. Something.

I actually don't know exactly what I need, but I need something to get my non-motivated-eating-every-thing-in-sight self back on the path to success.

So, in an effort to obtain that control back again, I'm going to commit to three very important things this week: 1.) Wear something cute and dress up every day; 2.) Step up the working out to 4-4am days; and 3.) Well, number three is private (but don't you wish you knew?!)

I'm going to step it up this week and Saturday, I will be rewarded with shopping and sushi. (I'm sure Mom will be thrilled.)

Have a fantastic week.

(The Game Face)

  

#3: Keeping up with the demand.

I wasn't aware that my blog would be such a hit. With an inbox flooded with "when's the next blog," I'm starting to wonder if I'm an exciting enough person to keep up with the demand. Don't worry though, I thought about it for about, oh..err...a couple seconds and decided, yes, yes I am exciting--and important!

It's been over a week since my last blog. Why the delay, you and every other person I run into ask? (*geeez) Well, because I'm busy being Global Mentor Network Coordinator, graduate student, super mom, wifey, and well fitness champ (I swear my arm muscles are so hard now.)

While I'm on the subject, let me just tell you a little about my workouts. My poor dad tries so hard to get me on a routine, and I am kind of, but while I'm not super girly-girl in life (*giggle), I am at the gym. I only target the areas that I feel are important. Who cares about back, shoulders, and whatever else I don't want looking any bigger than they already do. I work on my biceps, triceps, legs, stomach and especially my butt--all the time. Butt everytime--obsessively.

I love working out. I feel so good afterwards. It's amazing. Now if I could just stop eating those free ice cream cones from McDonalds, and get my behind back on the diet, I'd be doing well!

So, I'll stop talking about exercise now because let's face it, I'm sure you aren't all that concerned with these solid-as-a-small-to-medium-for-a-girl-sized guns hanging from my shoulders.

Let's talk about something much more important...drum roll please....

This morning I woke up ready to hit the stores. I got ready. Got the kids ready and headed over to pick up Mom. I called her a few minutes before getting there to let her know A.) We were going shopping, and B.) That she better be ready to leave the house in...oh...about 4 minutes. Needless to say, her response was something to the effect of, "Didn't I warn you not to call before 9?" "Nose blowing." "Hack/Cough." "Okay!"

Such the drama queen my mom is. God love her!

After getting her and my sweet cousin Zoie (who hates shopping, mind you) in the car I ventured out hoping to find some Lauren Conrad boots. 

Well, before we could even get on the freakin' inner-state I had stopped at three yard sales, one of which I was digging through kids clothes for over an hour. I was in heaven. Literally, heaven. I got a mega load from the lady for $6. Success.

...Searching for a point to this story......fail....crash....burn.

Such a tremendous day--although guys, I'm STILL bootless. Help me friends! The boots below, $236. Not happening for me in this lifetime. I need the > $50 version. Where are all my shoppers and shoe lovers?? Harmony??

 Moving on once again...Tomorrow Jay leaves for Atlantic City, and I have several things up my sleeve. (Let's hope Jay's not reading my blogs...if so, chances are I lost him when I started talking about Yard Sales and Heaven.)

Tomorrow I am going into psycho rearrange/clean mode. I'm transforming this house into Sparkle Land and I'm going to take tons of stuff to donate to Goodwill. Jay will return to half a closet and a ton of change. (*And boy does Jay love change--NO!)

How does someone like me, Change-a-holic, get hooked up with a hater. Lord only knows. =) All I do know is, it's on. Me against this house. I'm taking this sucker down, and the stink bugs strutting their stuff around my window sills, they're going down too.

In one corner: Amanda Wilson, the vaccum cleaner, and a swiffer mop; In the other: The Stink Bug Convention, the entire house, and [something clever I can't think of at the moment].

With that said, I need to go to bed. My brain is so tired that I am all out of clever one-liners. Fail. (again)

Have a wonderful evening and remember tomorrow is the Lord's day. =)

Peace.

Gather round for a tale of woe.

I'm certain I am clairvoyant. Sometimes I get the eeriest feeling--if it's dark and I'm alone downstairs I'll do the 'Jack Shepherd-eyes-closed-10-second-count-down' and then run as fast as I can to the bedroom and spastically jump in bed. My heart beating insanely. It's pure terror--and literally, frightening for me.

Although I don't believe in ghosts, this morning driving to work through Millwood, VA (*est. 5:15am) I saw a hooded man standing in the road. He had on a white robe. Seriously. He just stood there.  In the dark. In the middle of the road.

My first thought from a distance, "Umm...what is that guy doing and what if he tries to stop me?"

Keep in mind it was raining, dark, and fog-gy; so I steadily crept up on the poor old fellow and he still just stood there. As I got closer, I kind of started to panic because he wasn't even trying to move out of the road!

"Was it a man?"

"Was he alright?"

"Was it a ghost?"

"Had Jesus finally come back?"

I wasn't sure; however as I got closer, I realized it wasn't a man at all. It was the speed limit sign's reflection onto the glistening wet road.

I felt like an ID-I-OT, but was unable to truly soak in the actual shame of acting so stupid. I was again ridden with terror. Heart racing; and the hair on my arms and neck standing straight up! 

As I drove passed the cemetary (seriously) right beside where the old man/speed limit sign was standing,  I focused on the feeling I felt and became emersed in the fear. It was so intense; like a shock of electricity.

I considered stopping the SUV to calm myself down, but I was still so scared.

Anyway, I made it to work safely and relatively unruffled. No one could tell I had been through a traumatic experience, I played it very cool.

<3 A strange blog, I'm aware.

Need sleep.

Hello

Hi. My name's Amanda and I'm a blogger.

Actually, I have never blogged a day in my life--but today's a new day and thanks to Carolyn's Tsjuzzing It Up, I have become suber (super+uber) excited to start a blog of my own--"to tell the truth about [Amanda Wilson]" and to pass on the pure wisdom that is a direct result of my very-ruthless-yet-most-of-the-time-muy-productive insomnia.

So...let's do this.

My latest addiction, besides Rock Star Energy Drinks and beef jerky (*bark), is going to the gym at 4am to run, pump up like a freakin' champ, and divulge in fashion and gossip magazines. Turns out...I have gotten rather fond of the 80s'esque trends trying to weasle their over-the-top way back into the...wait what are we calling this new decade....the twenty-teens?

According to Lauren Conrad (love the girl): Stacking jewelry, a frilly/girly knit vest, and very tall (like knee or above) boots are the essentials for the fall season. So, with that in mind--because we all listen to Lauren Conrad--I set off on a mission for those things, along with a few others from (**sh.sh.shoutout!) Marie Claire's spectacular July edition (Taylor Swift was on the front--I couldn't resist.)

If you know me well, then you know (like Carolyn) I can't resist a bargain. I love to thrift shop and LOVE to find crazy good deals. SO..with toned-down-refined-80's fashion in mind I hit the three most excellent bargain stores around: Salvation Army/Winchester (crazy good selection), Past and Present II/Winchester (antique and junk heaven), and Gabriel Brothers/Winchester (Outlet store for random stores and designers.)

I came out with a bundle as usual. Check out a few of my favorites:

                                              **My favorite of all--SUPER cute! And, $3.99!!!!

                                                        **Love this one too. So pretty! $6.99

                              **I have an addiction to buying costume jewelry. Awesome stackable! $1.00

                                                       **LOVE! $1.00

                                                      **These earrings are so big. $1.00

(Three other dresses didn't photograph well.)

While my search for knee high boots is still on, I was very excited with my finds. I can't WAIT to wear all my new dresses and stacked jewelry.

In total, I spent around $50--but that included a $22 white bamboo/glass top table and two chairs that I got at a yard sale on the way back home. (It's going to need some tsjuzzing up for sure--but that's for another blog.)

I hope you liked my first blog! Get your boots back here for more...and for heavens sake subscribe and follow me. I need to look cool (mission in life.)

*Bow.